} stuck here waiting.


didn t really do much today.
watched Atlantis in the morning and played the computer the whole afternoon after that. too busy having fun with raquel and pauline. later learnt a lil beading session taught by my mom. she wanted me to make something for Kaka because she always get me something for christmas. in the end, i made her a pair of earrings. :D

i actually cooked!
i cooked porridge for dinner and prepared the ingredients :) i am so proud of my achievement! i finally finished one of my jigsaw puzzles. so romantic :D lilo is kissing stitch. i was thinking of goat the whole time i was doing it . man, and my mother actually talk to his mother this afternoon and she told me that after we arrive in singapore that day , some girls asked for his photos. bleurrrrgh. arggggh. bleurh!

was quite pissed at deborah and joanna just now . one can t make up her mind and the other dunno how to explain herself. so at first deborah cancelled her chalet and decided to stay with me instead and then joanna called and plead her to stay at the chalet and deborah was confused. i know she badly want to go but . hmm nevermind, anyway now she decided to stay at my house now :]

going to see some flower exhibition tomorrow. if i didn t see my mother's exasperation, i think i woudln t go with her . ): but flowers are cool :D especially when they are from all around the world!

btw, i heard this really really cool fact:

santa's original clothes colour are actually blackand white but because coca-cola decided to use santa claus as their advertisement and change the colour to red and white and from then on, people recognise santa claus as red and white instead :D

yeah. bet you didn t know that :)

} who's the fairest of them all?

wow. it's been raining a awful lot. i don t even need to on the air condition yesterday and i still can cover myself with a blanket? this shows how cold it is ! it 's been raining from last night until now! woot. i am repeating myself :]

played Tomba 2 this morning and i really put so much effort in it but my brother and I coudln find the memory card so in the end i have to delete everything! like argh, so wasted ):
went out to the new IKEA today and luckily it wasnt crowded . we still can find parking spaces? {a lot of them } omg omg omg , and ikea have really really nice meatballs! they are the only place where i know i can eat my meatball with confidence! :] Mm, love the gravy and the jam. it is so dam good can :D

my mother bought her shelves for the balcony and kitchen and i bought a full-length mirror to put in my room to admire myself 24 hours loong. i dunno what is wrong with my hair style these days, my center parting is showing D: i don t like partings. i don t even want to show any of them, INCLUDING CENTER! bleurgh. maybe it is the weather. maybe.

mr. wee sms today and i think he seem a lil shocked that i am not in the league? i mean there are so many good people in there! i am practically a baby when i go into that club. i think he seriously want me to play because he kept mentioning about division 2 . hmm. but mr. armin didn t even tell me and yvonne about anything regarding to the league. i think we are that bad

i don t like the jigsaws i bought yesterday. they are so thin and breaks up easily.
wonder what am i gonna do tomorrow. i can t always watch movies.

} monsoon season.

i`m finally finally home. just like yesterday, the rain was just as heavy. my entire jeans and sandals were wet! half the time i had to step in deep puddles ): so for those i have bought presents for today must appreciate it ! i shall complain to them in thier christmas cards to make it more sincere and also guilty and pressure on them to get me better presents. hah! :D

man, i am so mean. :}

went downtown today with yi lin and deb. sigh, meet that stupid lady from the `modelling agency` she just won t let me go? in the end i had to give her my number and this is the thrid time she is asking me :{ . i must complain! Yi lin say if i want to model there, i have to make a 300$ portfolio. wth, trying to cheat my money? They are the one that are suppose to pay me for the beautiful photos of me ! dam. i need to call the police :{ tmd.

watched ' trust the man ' . very very funny and a lil on the digusting side but it is ok because it is a NC 16 movie and i QUALIFY :D woot. i don t even need to show my ID card. someone congratulates me please :) before heading into the movie , took neoprints and ate ice cream at cinneleisure. we ordered five flavour but i only like 4 of them ): i don t like anything to do with green tea . So i just ate the brownie, rocky road, caramel fudge and triple chocolate. the art of being sinful :D

went to heeren later to look for males' present. so dam difficult to buy can }:[ one of them is so old fashion and the other one is so hip but still want feminine patterns. in the end , i got him some complicated pattern with a pink dot in it . i hope that is feminine enough. He is not even gay lor ! }:[ dunno what he is trying to prove . i dunno, i just can t stand guys who wear pink. it is just not right. Girls are lucky, they can wear universal colours and they look good and sexy in guys' clothes.

later went to buy xxx for someone . very funny . i was looking at the brown xxx but it didn t seem to have his size then the staff asked me if i needed help. I told him i wanted a bigger xxx for brown and the staff gave me a funny look and told me my (body part) * don t think dirty* werent that big! i told him i wanted to buy for somebody else and then i looked at his (body part) * don t think dirty* and asked for his size because i think someone`s size is the same. wah lau. this is getting so horny }:[ but it is not okays. So he smiled at me and gave me the size. I told the staff i would look around and after that i brought deborah with me and she told me it was fine! So i took that particular size and went to the counter. The staff smiled at me and said this was his size. I think i laughed quite loud because what he said wasn t really necessary but who cares. he kept staring at me after that.

have fun guessing :D
( in a clean way okays )

btw, it is not for a boyfriend, i don t have one , it just someone i am REALLLLLLLLLY close to.
even till the day i die :)

had sushi for dinner at heeren and headed down to taka later for yi lin to buy her boots. it looks really good and sexy :D btw, do you guys argee with me that the New Urban Male`s staff are good looking ? Are they really hire for their looks ? nevermind , later it was seriously pouring on my home. so depressing to walk alone especially in this weather. At least i don t think emo, like " i love to walk in the rain so no one can see my tears " holy crap .

bought 2 jigsaws to entertain myself and nobody wants to go out with me tomorrrrrow .
sigh. ):

} caramel`s death anniversary.

just came back from floorball training at Republic Poly. Yes, i finally made a decision to go. Going there was a problem. It was raining so heavily that my mother , brother and i got into a arguement. In the end i got my way :D i mean if i knew my way to RP, i would probably let them fetch me . However i didn t know anything, isn t it better to get the full information first and then you guys can fetch me the second time? sigh. it is the rain man, the rain

gathering at deborah`s house yesterday. nothing much. went back home at 11. i think half the time we were eating? so i killed yesterday`s calories by today`s training. i am all balanced now :D Coach scolded Yvonne and I today because we didn t understand one part of the drills. BUTTT, later he was nice enough to give us a koala bear magnet from australia. he said my koala bears were homosexual because one of them was on top of the other. i just laughed

anyway i dreamt that i wanted to eat pizzahut pizza today but my mother didn t let me get it . When i woke up , i was seriously craving for it and i ran down to tell my mother to go and order. She thought i was nuts and sleepwalking at first but we still ate pizzahut pizza - pepperoni flavour for lunch :) mMm.

yes. my father is going China again! :DDD
going to meet Yi lin and Deborah at orchard tomorrow. thank you that it is late in the afternoon if not i will be late again. Most of the time in Japan trip, people had to wait for us . I bet they think we are a nuisance. Anyway i can get somemore presents tomorrrrrow :)

{bless Caramel`s soul}

btw, it doesn t really matter to me now that i am not playing in the league :l

} have a jolly christmas :D

hey. this blog is collecting cyber dust. haven t really been updating it since i come back from Japan :x i just don t have the mood now . oh well, i just guess i try now . anyway my christmas list of giving to people is adding ): but christmas is all about giving and receiving :D i just hoped i will receive more ! hah!

went to watched a movie , The Holiday, with deborah yesterday. Pretty comical. Later went to buy christmas presents! Almost half of my list is checked . friggin happy. however , i still haven t got anything for the most important people in my life ): nevermind , monday monday monday! ahah, so shocked that jian wei got me a present already. it is the first christmas present i got from him after being his cousin for 16 years. he keep hinting to me he wants a brown shirt with feminine pattern. i don t like that ): since when was he gay? oh wait, one time he wore this shirt saying " i am your private dancer " hm. sometimes he can be so MAN.

japan trip was alright . seriously enjoyed myself there, except for the thrid day though. i vomitted ): but nevermind, lust from afar overcome alllll! i fell in front of him . friggin pai seh. thank god i didn t wore a skirt. i really kiao kah until i can t kiao kah anymore. Also, one time i thought i knocked on nanas door but it turned out to be his. i didn t even comb my hair. argh. #@$#$%#$%. dam it! oh yes. i finally saw, touched snow! i made a snowangel, snowball and a snowman. right. one of my dreams come true! (heart shape)

there is floorball training tomorrow. i honestly dunno whether should i go. i mean i am not in the league team and sigh. everything is so complicated and i thought going into club would solve everything. guess i am wrong about this one. besides , it is not as if i don t have time for the training, it is just me towards the people there. It is not there i have anything against them , it is just uncomfortable. the trouble of making new friends.

this blog is lagging. it makes my typing goooooo slooow. i wanted to change blog initially but the new version is crapping me off. so i shall stick with this.

listen to the new japanese song :D
heard it on the ANA flight .
love it :D

She had guts all right.

YESTERDAY

ahah. Had SGS floorball training and Mr.wee made me and yvonne watched a floorball video to show us when to position ourselve and what to do. Didn t really played much during the match because i didn t feel like it with the dumb moronic people were playing with us.

I changed my mind about going to Tessa to get a stick because Keith could get it at a much cheaper price. So in the end, Peipei joined Yvonne and I to watched a movie - Happy feet. It was average and mostly singing basically . But if you really think deeply, and reflect the movie Happy Feet into reality, Mambo is something like a person who is not academically talented. In their world of penguins, everybody had to sing but all he could do was to tap his feets which everybody find it a disgrace and pity . However no one ever thought of Mambo`s tapping of feet cuold be another talent. But movies shall be movies, Mambo was a hero. Do people like me ever get my own happy endings and the feeling of a hero?

Later i struggled to tell peipei the truth about what yvonne and I had been doing . I dunno if she was mad or anything.After that Yvonne and I rushed down for club training. very very tough training. and i hated it when the coach asked us to run around the school. the place is like so eerie and it is beside a temple. Because of this, i have to run faster , making me pant more. Today`s training was really multi racial , i could see a swedish player and some ang mors. I thought they were really stuck up and all but they are quite friendly. I saw Mark, we didn t even bother to make eye contact which i feel really bad of me . Because it wasn t really his fault . Anyway i am going to miss the last training at MI on friday because i will be in Malaysia picking fruits! :] this sucks because the last training is supposed to be the most fun and that when the selection starts.

I mean like this is bad, at first i already made a bad impression. sigh. Yvonne said she wants to quit the club because she is an introvert which was partly correct because when everyone sat together, they were in groups and yvonne and i stuck out as a awkward pair. I knew she hated this feeling. And it is also because she wants to join JC and all. that is serious pang-sehing of her lor.

the coach kept scolding me to kept both eyes open. i didn t really understand it at first. and when he scold me i just go HEHS? and it didn t really help because i was not that close to him and i was afraid to ask him what he mean. So everytime we made eye contact, he would say KEEP THE OTHER EYE OPEN LA. i felt really dumb at that time. so before i bathed, i looked at myself in the mirror, i finally got what the coach meant , my mickey mouse`s face shirt was winking


btw, Kor is back home :)

TODAY

woke up with a struggle to go to the temple with my mom and bro. I felt really confused. I mean here i am sometimes praying to God and now i am praying to Guan Yin Niang Niang. Am i betraying Him? However, i am not even a full - pledged christian. I haven t even been to chruch ONCE. so, who am i to believe now.

later joined nana, huay yi and uncle tai kit for lunch at bugis. Kor later suggested about drink bubble tea. i was quite happy when he said that for dunno what reason. He bought milk tea which i could have object because i never drank milk tea but sheet la , i just drink can :] Then he told me in australia, they sell bubble tea there for 6 dollars? LIKE OMFG. -bang table- you can buy 6 bubble tea with that 6 dollars. Then we went to an arcade and he didn t give me a dollar to try the picking up of toys machine.

Later went to raffles city because robinson had a 20% discount storewide. i didn t buy anything from t there but i bought a esprit pants.Had dinner at asian kitchen and it was the most spooky thing i had . I saw nana from afar and i started waving . Then suddenly this waiter pop out of no where and ask me what i want. I got a bad shock and screamed then when he was gone I started laughing to myself . I thought i was paranoid because he kept staring at me even after i have left the table and walked to the opposite shop with my brother. Then we were already quite far from asian kitchen , suddenly i felt someone tapping my shoulder and asking for my number in chinese. My first reaction was shit, i don t understand. I mean, when it comes to Chinese, i need to slowly hear it . Sometimes i think pauline and sandy get pissed at me wehn they type chinese in hanyu and i don t even understand . Then when i turned around , it was that waiter lor. I got such a bad shocked. I looked for a brother but he walked so far ahead not being aware that his sister is being stalked by a waiter. I quickly said no and ran off . I didn t even bother to look at his upset face. I think the way i said no was quite ugly because i said it like how people want me to donate but i just shake my head and give them a weak smile . I quickly tell my brother what happened. Then he like want to go find him and beat up the guy . I was like so scared. THen he asked me how he looked like and i descibed and then you know what he said, OHOH. is it the one , the face look like pug?

nevermind. anyway gotta go packed my bag for the trip to malaysia tomorrow. it is only one night (:

SHE WILL BE LOVED.

yes! finally got back my nokia phone . I had it for repair for four days and i had to use wen`s old phone. I prefer it than the nokia 2100. btw, i lost everybody`s number. so, if you sms me and i ask you who are you, please don t be pissed :). omg , kor kor is coming home already! i miss him i miss him i miss him i miss him :D

went out with deb( Miss i am ALWAYS right) to town to watch Material Girls. Not bad la , the stupid newspaper gave it a 1 star? Anyway i always like to watch movies where hillary duff is acting in.

having floorball training tomorrow then i want to head down to tessa to check out the sweet sticks :] so people, are you clueless on what to get me for Christmas? Here is a hint , I want a new floorball stick and a floorball bag. thanks , mooarks!

wooot. going malaysia on friday!
then i have to miss training. sigh.

Unwanted pieces of paper; crush it please.

omfg. i woke up at 8:30 to have a friendly match against our school . My stamina is like sheet la. I didn t even score a goal today. Depressing. I made a new friend - Cheryl. She is quite friendly :D Then we wanted to add each other on friendster, but i didn t get her email :l Maybe i should ask Fariza.

Sheet la . My knee is giving me problems. Today i was quite pissed at Sofian. He , Hmm how do i say, Nevermind. Just like kan ta bu shuang ? He keep looking down on me and giving me this freaking smirk which i felt like tearing it off his face. Then Suju told Gloria that i have this killer stare. LOOL. damn funny. Actually Suju is right . I do stare like that during the game . LOOL. Like i am panting already and you still smirk? Whatever. At least i have a pride and don t bootlick people. After 6-7 months of studying and not touching the stick, I lost my damn stamina. I better go jog everyday now . I think Mr.Wee was quite disappointed with me today. Sigh. Yeah. Some stupid goal of mine.

-

I went to the Hospital yesterday and took a blood test. I don t understand. Is the world really like this? How come i can survive the worst in the family but why is my body the most problematic. It is so depressing for me to keep thinking like this. Even my mother don t understand that sometimes, or maybe , nobody. I know they tried. But it is never the same unless your in the same shoes as me . Everybody is different . But i think i am the one that sticks out the most . i decided to walk around and i saw in the lobby of the hospital, there were PLENTY of folded cranes floating above my head. I think there are more than a thousand. They say if you make 1000 cranes, you can make a wish and your wish will come true.

I finally bought my dress! :DDDD
and i think my father was quite content that i join him to dinner today.

People say i should appreciate my talents for what it is .
But my talents are not here and there~

WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING DOWN AT?

i am in a pissed off mood. very pissed mood.

i don t understand. why is it in human nature that everyone only want the best? Not everybody is academically incline but they don t seem to understand. And that really hurt my heart because i can t help to think, that i am a burden? And it does not help that there are several smart ones in teh family. Like Fuck it la ! So what ?! Not clever enough for you , nothing is ever ENOUGH for you guys. Never good enough, Never smart enough, Never this Never that. I thought my talents were something to be proud of , but i am wrong. What the hell is there for me to show off? I got no brains and looks.

Btw Pauline, i am not mad at you.

Maybe i should just isolate myself so i won t seem to be a Baddy.

:D

LOL. my mother just can t get over the fact that i don t need to study for the next 4 months . i was watching a movie while she was heading out for her facial,

Me: BYE MOMMY!
Mom: Byebye, remember to help me off the soup!
Me: Mhmm.
Mom: Remember to study later !
Me: Uhuh, EH WHAT WHAT ! NO NEED ALREADY LA ! LOL

so funny.
-

didn t really do much today! wanted to go watch movie with yvonne , but she was all so lazy. Then tomorrow ! Yay, Mr Wee said i can join Skool! so freaking exciting . (: I waited 2 years for this and i won t let it get by me again! WOOOH. this is the life man! How many times can i say that? Anyway, i am getting BORED. come on, Life take me by my hands and bring me to places where you will leave me in awe .

WAH LAU. peipei clean her room? I ALSO CAN.
later la... (:

CHEEBS! IT IS ALL OVER OVER OVERRRRR . (:
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!

i just had a blast today! freaking fun (: the MCQ science was okays .

Finally went to Escape today. I couldn t controlled my excitment, i just could not stop giggling away on the way there? We took most of the rides and it is freaking hot in the early afternoon. It is also quite odd because there is only 3 of us so some of the rides, one of us has to sit alone.

We sat on the Flippers first~
I saw Cheryl , freaking lian and taller than me, i dunno what is she trying to prove whether she is cool or some sort cause she was wearing a jacket? I was sweating there like a pig and the way she walk, somehow tell me that she doesn t believe in the word ` HOT`, i think is more likely `cool` . The Flippers was not bad (: , 2 rounds only. i like the way we spin .

Later we sat on the Rainbow ):
this time i sat alone and it was quite weird because there is a big space beside me . So when the thing twirl, i keep sliding to the left and right. I was so afraid my pants would be black. LOOL. then i think we sat on the viking ship where i felt i almost wanted to vomit cause it was too slow.
i didn t get to sit at the end ); this time we sat together (: Btw, we saw Denise too!

Peipei and I tried the WaterLog later. ( yvonne chicken out (:) I change slippers with her and queue up. VERY FUNNY. For the waterlog, you have the small and the big one. The small one was okays. When we were preparing for the grand one, we saw the signboard "15 metres high, please do not try to stand up" i think both of us panic LOL. I couldn t stand the part where the waterlog was going up and there is this loud cracking sound that goes : TIK TEETIK. Peipei made me sit in front ):

We went to the Haunted house later. the first time we went in, i pushed peipei in front then I was in the middle and Yvonne the last , and in front of us was this brother and his little sister. So the first time when we went in, we were so scared , we just saw machines moving (dummys) then we quickly run out. All of us went to sit on a mini roller coaster. i sat with a lil girl (: . We queued 1 hour and 1o minutes for the goKART. my neck ache. Driving down the slope was pretty scary and it really hurt your head cause the road had little bumps on the floor and your head will jerk alot!

It rained heavily after that. So we just sat around in the shelter because all the rides had to stop temporarily but the Haunted house didn t . So i made Yvonne and Peipei join me again. OMG. THE SECOND TIME WAS REALLY REALLY HILARIOUS. i think the HH have 6 pathways, like a maze. So we were like already comforting ourselves that we know what will happen and all so we walk like quite proud? LOOOL. So later when we almost wanted to pass this prison, A dummy supposingly sitting on the floor, jumped out and pulled open the fake bars and chased out. The malays girls in fron t of us screamed and ran towards us . Then i was thinking wth? Then i saw him heading towards me. I also tiok pa! Then i think Yvonne and Pei pei scream. Then then Malays girls dunno where they were going , banged into me and pushed me against the wall! I was like OMG! i dunno, when i am scared and shocked, i just stand there and don t run? So i leaned against the wall and use my hands to cover my eyes and I shake my head . In my mind , i keep thinking he will come and tickle me? So the monster was wearing a hood over and holding a sickle. So when i put my hand down, the stupid monster was a few steps away and slashing the sickle against the wall. I think it scared the Malays girls more cause they ran towards the entrance screaming OPEN THE DOOR OPEN THE DOOR OPEN THE DOOR! banging on it somemore. Then i was like quite clueless cause the entrance had this poster of a monster which i thought was another stupid real monster , so i just stand in the middle? Then the door open , and i saw yvonne ran out , then peipei also, then i felt somebody pulled me outside but i was like , i want to stay inside? LOOOOL so after we were out, we were panting like crazy. Then the Gatekeeper was laughing away then he tell us if we want to play again, we have to queue up!

like omg. I go in like not 5 minutes but i queued longer than that?

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL.
i still cannot stop laughing because i saw Yvonne screaming because Yvonne is not those type of girls who scream and get scared easily.
i think the stupid guy must be laughing his arse off la.

We ate dinner at Tampines and went home (:

-

Went to Yi Lin`s house yesterday to celebrate Ah gu`s birthday.
Deborah , Sufen and I walked Rocky
We saw the trojan horse house (:

BUBBLE DRESSSSS . -POP-

actually , i am not in the mood of blogging (:
but i force myself (:

i finally got my passport photo done! it waited like 3 hours in the boring immigration office . luckily i had huay yi to pei me , if not i would just DIE. anyway i saw this freaking freaking freaking nice goth (hi yoges) bubble dress that is $145.95! like argh, my mom say too bad i don t have a prom or a graduation , if not she will consider getting it for me ): . like what yoges and i said, CHEEBS LA.

i bought this 23$ necklace from TOPSHOP. (:
and i ate a fondue.

life is getting better as O levels starts to escape through your fingers.

-

LEFT ONE MORE MCQ SCIENCE :D

TU AMORRRR.

hey. that song is great (:

anyway i am having my account MCQ tomorrow. this is last i will be seeing all my tuition teachers man! muahaha. anyway i am so god name happy, yvonne has finally agreed to go to escape on 20th november which is the last of all the Os paper. like woot, forking happy (: . no wait, that is ys, i mean, SPOONING HAPPY.

anyway going to change my passport photo tomorrow then hanging out at suntec. i hope to find my dress there (:

btw, going to ah gu house for his birthday on sunday. ROCKY HERE I COME ! (:

YOU ARE ASKED TO CHOOSE A DOOR.

hey ! (: it is 1:37am in the morning but i am feeling damn hyper?

anyway, i got my BOLD BIG HEADING from the book " the curious incident of the dog in the night-time" damn nice. please read it . i think i read it last time because richielyn read it. whatever, a book is meant for everybody to read. OH YEAH, talking about dog, i adopt a virtual dog (: she is blue and her name is glitter. She will only shut up when she have a ball in her mouth.

then pauline was like playing with my dog then she tell me,

pauline: Your dog can t catch the ball i throw.
me: IT CAN IT CAN! it always catch my ball!
pauline: no it can t , because i throw it at the floor.
me: maybe she don t want to catch, cause your hand is SMELLY

LOL. damn funny.
Later Ys, Pauline and I were a smart set of utensils. I am SPOON, pauline is BOWL, Ys is FORK! we wanted seraphine to be the knife but she refused ): maybe deep down, she rather be the chopsticks.

Anyway, please listen to My Love - Justin Timberlake.
that song totally rock my socks off. damnsexy(:

I LEFT 2 MORE MCQ PAPER!
ACCOUNT AND COMBINE SCIENCE ! freakin happy.
don t worry about it, i will study and not to use my eraser as a dice.

btw, Kor is coming home soon!
i am 50% happy and 50% confused.
I dunno, maybe it is because i can t wait to receive the presents he got for me (: and becuase i haven t seen him for a long long long long time! but i am confuse because the same symtoms are going to appear. He is 80% NOT at home. He is either with:

1) his girlfriend
2)his girlfriend
3) his girlfriend
4) ta de nu peng you
5) help me to translate "his girlfriend" in other languages . >:[
6) his brothers
7) his army friends
8) his PS2
9) his girlfriend

maybe if i wish really hard..

10) HIS LOVING CARING PRETTY BEAUTIFUL CUTE SISTER , JINGYUN!

you guys must be coughing in delight. :D

BY THE WAY I AM
ANTI-CLOGS.

THEY DO HARM TO ESCALATORS!

youmakemewannaOOHOOH.

hey, happy belated birthday dear huay yi (:
your one year older!
love you lots!

-

you know i was thinking (after a game of mahjong with my computer) who i could count on if i was in trouble or just suffer from a down fall, is there anyone i can count on? Is there anyone i can just bawl on his/her shoulders without having to worry whether his/her shirt is gonna be wet and he/she is going to mind. Seriously, do you have one? Not everybody is fortunate enough to enjoy this counting on or supporting on partner or buddy. I mean , please don t take for granted for those around you ; you would never know when something might happen and everything have vanished or simply gone. Family, friends, whatever you think he or she is.

I honestly think the world is changing. When i was still in primary school, i thought Paint programme was the most fun thing in my computer but look at the kids around you, ( i mean primary school) , BLOG! ; Barbie doll is like an old school thing now. When i was still in primary school, i only BGR only exist in the adult world, but holy shit, primary school kids are getting thier HIM and HER already. Where was i during thier age! What was i even doing at thier age! Hold on , i think i remember , I was playing Neopets and play-pretends. So, if this is the case, i must be really hopeless in love because i can t seem to find THE ONE if finding a boyfriend or a girlfriend in important in the universe now. LIKE GOD. i can t even recalled being depressed over a boy when i was 12 .

I think it is the milk. You know, the chemicals in those milk powder ? Too much elements in it. The kids grew up smart in other stuff. So , traditionally , breast milk is the best. it is natural. Unless the mother is one of those who is made to drink those chemically dangerous milk powder. Then the whole story would be different again. And if it is like this, i probably be writing a novel.
Maybe the book`s title is Jingyun`s negative idea about milk powder. Well, actually milk powder is just one side of the story, it is up to you to search the other side.

i am shivering in my room. The air-con is blasting at my spine, even my fingers are getting a lil numb. You know , everyday life is changing without you knowing it. I am almost finishing this race and moving on to another. Secondary school life , i can wave goodbye to it soon. My mother can t wait for me to work. I dunno, i need a freakin break first. Work? Eventually...

and fuck, my school don t have a prom. i want a gown? D:

there is no such thing as HIM.
be self-centered, There is such thing as a ME.

SUMMER DRESSES. BEACH. SUN. SAND, ANYMORE?

man , i am so craving for a dress to wear. i saw a $208 one today at marine parade.
i think i need to sell off my organ to get that money to buy that freaking dress. anyway, math paper 2 was rather easy today , though some people find it hard.

alright, 3 more paper. like WHOO HOOO.
10 more days and counting.

today dinner was like suck.
but the dessert was like AWESOME (:
i ate so many sinful thing lor.
like strawberry cheeese cake, tiramisu, chocolate liquor cake, and this strawberry custard thing
LIKE OMFG :DD!

yay, people say i lose weight.
but i must lose MORE!
:D

DREAMS

finally English is over .
i can speak singlish now (:
geog geog geog.
this one must really pia.

PAIN IN THE ARSE.

THANK GOD! the merger came out! All the stick-man cartoons i drew did not go to waste. WAHAHAHAHAS. i feel so evil. But seriously, i don really know what the question were tlaking about . Lets see, Math is a total A no more.

Anyway, i really really love my blogskin.
Thanks to my dearest pauline :D

Chemistry is tomorrow yet i am feeling tired now.

KALAPUI

right , monday is social studies and math paper 1 . i am so hyped up for ss. i am supposed to study 4 chapters but i am studying 2. i am seriously waiting for 20th november to come. after that, it is hallalujah. :D what joy.

you know, several blogpost i have written about her. let just say i don t give a damn anymore. Rich simply can t tell me in the face that i am arrogant and love to attract attention and i have change. Honestly rich, if this is how you want it, then fine, we just go our separate ways. If you simply hate my presence so much, tell me straight in the face, afterall you been through so much hardship, surely you don t have the guts to tell me? I am not your toy , Rich. You don t just leave me there on the shelf to rot and play with me ONLY WHEN YOU LIKE IT. I am arrogant but you didn t tell me the examples so how do you expect me to change for you? But hold on, if we are friends, shoudln t we accept each toher good and bad points? well, hell to that man! it doesn t even matter to you even more. I don t understand why i am so discreet about it in the past, maybe because i respected you. So yeah, go play with your Eunice. She is all that matters.
i guess the ship have sank.

You know sometimes when i am so stressed from studying. i just can t stop thinking about people or things that have affected or caused a great impact in my life. I think about the person who almost killed my mother, i think about arguements. I don t understand. Why is it i am always at the loser end? Why is it i can t think at the positive side? Why do i have to torture myself this way? And for these type of questions, there is really no answers behind it all and therefore are we just left there clueless? Sometimes i just feel that the word ` FRIENDS` and `LOVE` can be such a nuisance in life. For me, they create nothing but troubles. However, i forgotten those people who give such great examples on these words, like my Mother , Yvonne , Peipei, Deborah and so on. If there are several good sides and bad sides in everyone, why is it that we are never fair? never fair in our doings?

i hate myself for my stupidity into falling into traps like this because some traps you fall into, you simply don t learn. I have forgotten the pain i have felt, the scars i have suffered from. It is like once again, a new experience for me everything except for the worse.

Yi Lin :

I was never talking bad about your friend, Lara. I was just refering to the virtual cat. It had never occured to me that the name Lara was a friend of yours. It was a misunderstanding between Deborah, you and I. We just wanted you to put a virtual dog called Rocky. It was never a harmful thing about your friend , Lara. So yeah, if i really hurt you, i am sorry.


Deborah:

Nobody ever said love was easy. Strive hard for Os (:

Pauline:

Waiting for that beautiful blogskin :D!